I can't believe it's been a whole month since I posted. Probably a testament to how busy we've been with traveling and work and all of that good and fun stuff.
When Teddy was born, he wasn't home three days and Charlie said, "We're done. We're not having any more kids." I laughed at him and told him that this was not necessarily the time to make that kind of a decision. He argued that it was the perfect time. That when you're in the thick of the newborn phase was the perfect time to make that kind of a decision, because you know just exactly how bad it is. And in a way, he's right. After not that long, I was on board. Neither one of us are super fond of newborns. Those first six months really suck. Some women seem to love it, I am not one of them. I love my boys with all my heart, and they are by far the best thing that has ever happened to me, but I really, really hate that newborn phase.
So we weren't having any more. I gave away all my baby stuff. I actually sold it at a garage sale, but we sold it for pretty cheap. Most of our bibs, my cheap clothes, some burp cloths, our bassinet. The bumbo chair. One of our bouncers.
Then Teddy turned a year old. I weaned him. It was sad for me. But I started to get this feeling like I wanted another baby. I brushed it off, figured it was just the hormones from weaning. But it's stuck around. If we were going to have another, I'd like to do it soon. For one, I'm not getting any younger, but for another, Max and Ted are so close in age. I don't want them to be a ton older than the next. Plus, let's just get the hard parts over with. Traveling with Max now is easy-peasy. Ted is getting easier. So let's not get to a comfortable place and then go backwards. Just keep on with the challenging times.
There are a million reasons not to have another. How in the world will be get three kids into car seats in the car? Max will have to be in the back, and because he'll still be in the convertible car seat, someone will have to climb into the back to buckle him, because there is no way he'll be able to buckle himself. When we took Max to Tanya's, she charged us $100 a week for two days. Which seemed kinda steep, but whatever. When Ted came along, she doubled it to $200. I don't think I can justify $300. In a similar vein, Charlie is not at all sure he can handle three kids at home by himself. He's actually only home with them by himself for two full days a week - Monday and Thursday. But having three will definitely be a lot more difficult. Max will go to preschool, but that is only two days a week and only for a few hours. So it will actually probably be worse bc I'm sure preschool will interfere with nap time and he'll have to take all three kids out to leave Max at preschool for 2-3 hours and then go back and pick him up. We gave away a lot of our baby stuff already. Flying home to see people will be that much more expensive. Packing and getting to the airport and on the plane and to our destination will be that much more difficult.
But this is the thing. It's not that hard to climb into the back seat. And who knows, maybe Max will figure out how to buckle himself. We don't know that Tanya will charge us $300/wk. She may realize that's a tall order and that Max is getting easier and only go to $250. Or we can work around that. Max could go to daycare, he's old enough now and the social interaction may be good for him. Max and Ted actually play pretty well together, and there may be more Daniel Tiger watching than we'd like, but Charlie could make it work at home with 3. Lots of people do. We still have the basics of baby stuff. Our pack and play that we used for Max has an infant insert. I saved a good number of bibs and the nice burp cloths for myself. We lent one of our bouncers to our neighbors, we could ask for it back. I still have one bumbo seat. I kept all the nice clothes, and who knows, maybe it will be a girl and she'd need all new clothes anyways. Traveling would be more expensive. There is no getting around that. And more difficult while they're little. For sure.
We've talked about it. One day I feel like I'm on board, the next I'm not. Charlie seems like he could be convinced if I was really passionate about it, but I'm not.
I wonder if anyone ever truly feels their family is complete? Like, "Oh, OK. We've reached maximum capacity. We're good!" I dunno. What I do know, is that they are so, damn, cute. And funny. And their smile lights up your whole world. And watching them grow into toddlers and kids and little people is pretty incredible.
So who knows. Maybe. Maybe not. Even if we want to, there is no guarantee it will happen. Infertility strikes at crazy times for all sorts of people. For now I'm still on the fence. But they are pretty cute...
When Teddy was born, he wasn't home three days and Charlie said, "We're done. We're not having any more kids." I laughed at him and told him that this was not necessarily the time to make that kind of a decision. He argued that it was the perfect time. That when you're in the thick of the newborn phase was the perfect time to make that kind of a decision, because you know just exactly how bad it is. And in a way, he's right. After not that long, I was on board. Neither one of us are super fond of newborns. Those first six months really suck. Some women seem to love it, I am not one of them. I love my boys with all my heart, and they are by far the best thing that has ever happened to me, but I really, really hate that newborn phase.
So we weren't having any more. I gave away all my baby stuff. I actually sold it at a garage sale, but we sold it for pretty cheap. Most of our bibs, my cheap clothes, some burp cloths, our bassinet. The bumbo chair. One of our bouncers.
Then Teddy turned a year old. I weaned him. It was sad for me. But I started to get this feeling like I wanted another baby. I brushed it off, figured it was just the hormones from weaning. But it's stuck around. If we were going to have another, I'd like to do it soon. For one, I'm not getting any younger, but for another, Max and Ted are so close in age. I don't want them to be a ton older than the next. Plus, let's just get the hard parts over with. Traveling with Max now is easy-peasy. Ted is getting easier. So let's not get to a comfortable place and then go backwards. Just keep on with the challenging times.
There are a million reasons not to have another. How in the world will be get three kids into car seats in the car? Max will have to be in the back, and because he'll still be in the convertible car seat, someone will have to climb into the back to buckle him, because there is no way he'll be able to buckle himself. When we took Max to Tanya's, she charged us $100 a week for two days. Which seemed kinda steep, but whatever. When Ted came along, she doubled it to $200. I don't think I can justify $300. In a similar vein, Charlie is not at all sure he can handle three kids at home by himself. He's actually only home with them by himself for two full days a week - Monday and Thursday. But having three will definitely be a lot more difficult. Max will go to preschool, but that is only two days a week and only for a few hours. So it will actually probably be worse bc I'm sure preschool will interfere with nap time and he'll have to take all three kids out to leave Max at preschool for 2-3 hours and then go back and pick him up. We gave away a lot of our baby stuff already. Flying home to see people will be that much more expensive. Packing and getting to the airport and on the plane and to our destination will be that much more difficult.
But this is the thing. It's not that hard to climb into the back seat. And who knows, maybe Max will figure out how to buckle himself. We don't know that Tanya will charge us $300/wk. She may realize that's a tall order and that Max is getting easier and only go to $250. Or we can work around that. Max could go to daycare, he's old enough now and the social interaction may be good for him. Max and Ted actually play pretty well together, and there may be more Daniel Tiger watching than we'd like, but Charlie could make it work at home with 3. Lots of people do. We still have the basics of baby stuff. Our pack and play that we used for Max has an infant insert. I saved a good number of bibs and the nice burp cloths for myself. We lent one of our bouncers to our neighbors, we could ask for it back. I still have one bumbo seat. I kept all the nice clothes, and who knows, maybe it will be a girl and she'd need all new clothes anyways. Traveling would be more expensive. There is no getting around that. And more difficult while they're little. For sure.
We've talked about it. One day I feel like I'm on board, the next I'm not. Charlie seems like he could be convinced if I was really passionate about it, but I'm not.
I wonder if anyone ever truly feels their family is complete? Like, "Oh, OK. We've reached maximum capacity. We're good!" I dunno. What I do know, is that they are so, damn, cute. And funny. And their smile lights up your whole world. And watching them grow into toddlers and kids and little people is pretty incredible.
So who knows. Maybe. Maybe not. Even if we want to, there is no guarantee it will happen. Infertility strikes at crazy times for all sorts of people. For now I'm still on the fence. But they are pretty cute...
2 comments:
When Karrah came home, we knew that was it. I am so glad there are THREE of you! So much fun and work and joy and sometimes frustration. Would never have wanted to do it without any of you. ♥️♥️♥️
Three is definitely a crew !
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